B Movies Blog

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January 2026

January 2 – We Bury The Dead (Theaters)

January 6 – Will Trent (ABC, Next day Hulu)

January 8 – The Traitors (Peacock)

January 8 – His & Hers (Netflix)

January 9 – People We Meet On Vacation (Netflix)

January 9 – Sleepwalker (Theaters)

January 9 – Primate (Theaters)

January 16 – Night Patrol (Theaters)

January 16 – 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple (Theaters)

January 21 – The Beauty (FX, Next day Hulu)

January 21 – Queer Eye (Netflix)

January 22 – Finding Her Edge (Netflix)

January 23 – Return to Silent Hill (Theaters)

January 28 – School Spirits (Paramount+)

January 28 – Shrinking (Apple TV+)

January 30 – Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die (Theaters)

January 30 – Iron Lung (Theaters)

January 30 – Send Help (Theaters)

February 2026

February 6 – The Strangers: Chapter 3 (Theaters)

February 6 – Dracula (Theaters)

February 6 – Pillion (Theaters)

February 6 – Whistle (Theaters)

February 8 – The ‘Burbs (Peacock)

February 13 – “Wuthering Heights” (Theaters)

February 13 – GOAT (Theaters)

February 13 – Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie (Theaters)

February 18 – 56 Days (Prime)

February 20 – This is Not a Test (Theaters)

February 25 – Scrubs (ABC, next day Hulu)

February 27 – Scream 7 (Theaters)

March 2026

March 5 – Ted (Peacock)

March 6 – The Bride (Theaters)

March 6 – Peaky Blinders: The Eternal Man (Theaters, Netflix on March 20)

March 11 – Scarpetta (Prime)

March 18 – Imperfect Women (Apple TV+)

March 20 – Project Hail Mary (Theaters)

March 27 – Ready or Not: Here I Come (Theaters)

March 27 – Fantasy Life (Theaters)

March 27 – They Will Kill You (Theaters)

April 2026

April 3 – The Drama (Theaters)

April 8 – The Boys (Prime)

April 10 – Malcolm in the Middle (Hulu)

April 15 – Margo’s Got Money Troubles (Apple TV+)

April 17 – The Mummy (Theaters)

April 17 – Normal (Theaters)

May 2026

May 1 – The Devil Wears Prada 2 (Theaters)

May 1 – Hokum (Theaters)

May 15 – Obsession (Theaters)

May 22 – I Love Boosters (Theaters)

June 2026

June 12 – Scary Movie 6 (Theaters)

June 19 – Toy Story 5 (Theaters)

July 2026

July 12 – Disclosure Day (Theaters)

July 17 – The Odyssey (Theaters)

August 2026

August 21 – Insidious: The Bleeding World (Theaters)

August 28 – The Dog Star (Theaters)

August 28 – Coyote vs. ACME (Theaters)

September 2026

September 11 – Sense and Sensibility (Theaters)

September 18 – Practical Magic 2 (Theaters)

September 18 – Play House (Theaters)

September 18 – Resident Evil (Theaters)

October 2026

October 1 – Terrifier 4 (Theaters)

October 2 – Digger (Theaters)

October 9 – Other Mommy (Theaters)

October 16 – Street Fighter (Theaters)

October 23 – Remain (Theaters)

November 2026

November 20 – The Hunger Games: Sunrise on the Reaping (Theaters)

December 2026

December 18 – Avengers: Doomsday (Theaters)

December 18 – Dune: Part Three (Theaters)

December 25 – Werewulf (Theaters)

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping André Øvredal’s The Last Voyage of the Demeter into ol’ VCR. 

Friends, I won’t bury the lede. The Last Voyage of the Demeter is a really fun summer horror blockbuster. Nothing more, nothing less. Outside of the obnoxious men who sat behind us and proceeded to talk throughout the entirety of the movie, I don’t really have any complaints. 

The Last Voyage of the Demeter checks all the boxes: 

• A mysterious and last-minute addition to the crew 
• A captain who is two days away from retirement and too old for this shit 
• A David Dastmalchian character with a surname that sounds eerily similar to Cam Gigandet’s character from The O.C.

It also comes complete with a good ol’ fashioned cinematic score and similar vibes to Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl. If you’re a fan of the Boulet Brothers, you may also find yourself comparing bits and pieces to their number from their Halfway to Halloween special. 

This is how y’all look yelling at service industry employees who are just trying to do their jobs. 

I also have a couple of CW/TWs for this one, but they do contain spoilers, so I’m giving you a chance to skip these warnings.

Last chance. 

[CW/TW: child death, animal death, and animal gore] 

Much like Talk to Me, The Last Voyage of the Demeter doesn’t really hold back. If you’re triggered by animals or children dying, this may not be the movie for you. 

I’ve heard some people compare this movie to the Universal Monster movies, and I’d have to agree. It’s very straightforward, and there isn’t a lot of glitz and glam. However, it’s still solid. 

So, friends, get ready to set sail on one of the most unfortunate voyages of all time. 

I know most cruises come with unlimited buffets, but this is ridiculous.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping a birthday message into the ol’ VCR. 

Well, friends, here we are. Today, I’m 31. 

In the past year, I’ve started my own movie blog and YouTube channel. 

I’ve branched out. 

I’ve started making big strides towards my goals. 

I’m in the best place I’ve been in years, and I have all of you to thank. 

Thank you all for supporting my wonderful and weird blog over the past few months.

Thank you for letting me share all of my passions with you, from movies to ARGs to series. 

Thank you for supporting my budding YouTube channel and watching me nerd out about pop culture. 

Thank you so much for letting me share all of these things with you, as well as sharing all of your opinions with me. 

I’ve come a long way from being the kid who sat on the living room floor watching orange Nickelodeon VHS tapes on the weekends. 

The little girl who used to lay brooms on the arms of sofas and pretend to fly with the Sanderson Sisters wouldn’t believe that she grows up to share her love of movies with the world. 

And, more importantly, that people want her to. 

So, friends, here’s to 31. 

May the movies be good and the popcorn be fresh.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping 31 movies that made me into the ol’ VCR. 

Friends, tomorrow is my 31st birthday. 

[Hold for applause] 

In my 31 years of life, I’ve seen a LOT of movies. Dare I say, thousands? However, there are several movies I either watched during my formative years that stuck with me, or that I constantly revisit, be it for inspiration or a good time. 

I’ve decided to share a comprehensive list for all of you (without thinking through how long it would take to write) to celebrate making it to 31. As an added bonus, I’ve thrown in pictures of customs from Halloweens past and other pieces I’ve written on some of these movies for kicks and giggs. 

Now, I might be a year older, but I’m still going to throw out a quick disclaimer. I know that some of these directors are trash and/or some of these movies didn’t age well, and I fully acknowledge it. If you don’t feel comfortable watching some of these movies, I totally understand! 

So, friends, slice up some cake and grab your balloons as we dive into the 31 movies that made me. 

Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion: There’s no greater reward than releasing the Lisa Lunar of your graduating class. 

Clueless: Who among us wouldn’t succumb to the charm of a young Paul Rudd?

Practical Magic: A queer woman’s kryptonite. 

A Cinderella Story: I watch this movie after every single breakup/bad experience like medicine. 

Jennifer’s Body: It’s like watching the Barbies you used to make kiss each other IRL. 

Halloween 2020, which I obviously spent at home 

The Blair Witch Project: “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?” A brilliant horror movie, Heather. 

10 Things I Hate About You: If you can’t quote this movie, I don’t trust you. 

Carrie: My grandmother makes Margaret White look like a good time. 

Heathers: KP and I ordered matching monocle necklaces to match Veronica. 

Scream: This might be the most obvious movie on this entire list. 

Halloween 2016

A Goofy Movie: I was in love with Max Goof for several years of my childhood and will be taking no further questions. 

Harriet the Spy: Someone stole my journal one day, read it, and quickly gave it back, so I don’t know what that says about me as a person. 

Almost Famous: The source of my lifelong infatuation with Patrick Fugit. 

Purple Rain: I went alone to see this movie at Alamo Drafthouse the night that Prince died, and it felt like my kind of church. 

Sixteen Candles: I’m almost double Sam’s age. WOOF. 

Legally Blonde: Turning 31? What, like it’s hard?

Halloween 2021

The Halloween Tree: I miss you, KP. 

Ginger Snaps: Outside of the lycanthropy, this is how I felt as a teenage girl. 

Cruel Intentions: I don’t think this movie needs a witty explanation. 

Elvira, Mistress of the Dark: Bob and Elvira are STILL one of my couple costume goals. 

Halloween 2022

Jawbreaker: I still don’t understand how this movie ranks so low on Rotten Tomatoes. 

Silence of the Lambs: I told one of my old bosses this was my favorite movie in a job interview and was hired on the spot. Thanks, Dave. 

The Guest: If you’ve ever asked me for a horror rec, you know how annoying I am about this movie. 

The Craft: I wanted to be Fairuza Balk for a very long time. 

Halloween (1978): I was actually Laurie Strode in high school. 

Halloween 2017

Saved!: It’s like they left a camera out in the youth groups of my hometown and then wrote a screenplay. 

Rocky Horror Picture Show: My sister rented this for me when I had strep throat in the 10th grade, and I proceeded to make every single person I know watch it. 

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: I used to practice staking my pillows with twigs I found outside. Just in case. 

The Lost Boys: Richard Gilmore, what are you doing here?

Hocus Pocus: I maintain that this movie is the reason I read tarot as an adult. 

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen: I was absolutely Lola Stepp in my teenage heart.  

Halloween 2018

Honorable mentions

• Bring it On: How did I truly ever think I was straight?
• Hope Floats: This was one of mine and KP’s favorites. We scoured thrift stores trying to find the silver lunchbox I now have to match Sandy B’s. 
• The Faculty: Featuring Queen Famke Janssen

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping some of cinema’s deranged damsels into the ol’ VCR. 

Now, before we get into this piece, I’m going to give a disclaimer. I’ll give you all a minute to groan. 

Okay, ready?

I don’t think mental illness is a joke, and I’m not here to poke fun at people. I have clinical depression and anxiety myself. All of the movies and characters I mention in this piece are over the top and campy. I’m, in no way, being derogatory towards anyone with mental illnesses/mental health issues, and I never would. 

The subjects of this piece are the female characters who originally seem helpless/distraught/wounded, only to slit your throat as you bend down to help them up (I love this line, so if you don’t comment on anything else, throw me a bone on this one line). After careful consideration, I’ve chosen seven characters to hone in on, with an honorable mention to boot. 

With the particulars out of the way, let’s get into it.  

A Simple Favor 

First and foremost: Blake Lively, please slap the sorry out of me. We’ve talked about my love for Blake Lively in A Simple Favor before, so I’ll keep the gushing to a minimum. 

Secondly, I love this movie. There are scenes of high camp, it has mystery, and Blake Lively plays a femme fatale for the 21st century. When she initially befriends Anna Kendrick’s character, Stephanie, we think two women both struggling to connect with other mothers have found each other. 

Spoiler: both are more complex than we could have ever imagined, and their lives simultaneously unravel and intertwine leading to one hell of a third act. 

Find someone who looks at you the way Anna Kendrick looks at Blake Lively. 

Gone Girl 

Man, oh man. I hadn’t read Gillian Flynn’s novel before watching the movie, so I totally fell for Ben Affleck’s Chris Watts impression. The power this movie wields is truly incredible. We as an audience are manipulated into thinking Ben Affleck’s Nick Dunne is guilty as sin. That is until our perception is once again flipped, and Rosamund Pike’s Amy Dunne is revealed to be more calculated and manipulated than we could have ever expected. 

However, Carrie Coon’s Margo is really the most innocent person in the movie, as there’s more to every character’s story along the way. 

At its core, Gone Girl is essentially a masterclass in controlling audience perspective. 

When it comes to playing villains with bobs, Rosamund Pike is god tier. 

SwimFan 

Don’t @ me, but Swimfan is just a teenage version of Fatal Attraction. BUT, it’s still one of my guilty pleasures. I definitely had the hots for Jesse Bradford (especially as Cliff in Bring it On). Swimfan is steamy, campy fun, and Erika Christensen’s Madison embodies the deranged damsel. 

The plot of this film is as shallow as the kiddie pool. 

The Roommate 

Now, I’m fully aware that The Roommate is simply a remake of Single White Female. I know Single White Female is iconic, and I’ll never be able to think about SWF without picturing Jennifer Jason Leigh’s wig. My defense of The Roommate is as follows: 

1. Someone gets their BELLY BUTTON RING RIPPED OUT 
2. It stars Leighton Meester, Minka Kelly, Aly Michalka, AND Cam Gigandet. 
3. I scared the hell out of a couple of my friends who were younger than me and going into college the year after me. 

Call it nostalgia or bad taste, but Leighton Meester’s Rebecca deserves a spot on this list. 

Pictured: My anxiety reminding me of something I did in the 10th grade while I’m trying to sleep. 

Nightmare Alley 

Cate Blanchett as Dr. Lilith Ritter. Holy moly. I know this movie received mixed reviews, but I honestly really enjoyed it. Cate Blanchett absolutely destroys Bradley Cooper’s Stanton Carlisle, and the reveal is incredible. Additionally, we don’t often see Cate Blanchett as a villain, so it’s interesting to see her in a new light in the Nightmare Alley remake. 

Like c’mon. 

Sunset Blvd.

We’re taking it back to one of the original deranged damsels, Norma Desmond. Sunset Blvd. is an important film for many reasons, but the relationship between William Holden’s Joe and Gloria Swanson’s Norma Desmond is an important prototype for this subgenre of film. Norma Desmond is initially presented as a forgotten starlet who spends her days reminiscing about her Hollywood days. However, as she and Joe’s relationship evolves, it becomes more evident that Norma isn’t as harmless as she may seem. 

Me watching my Hot Pocket in the microwave.

Fatal Attraction (The TV series) 

This is a hot take, but I’m actually enjoying the Fatal Attraction series more than I enjoy the movie. Chalk it up to my love of both Joshua Jackson and Lizzy Caplan, but I think it’s more realized than the original. Lizzy Caplan’s Alex Forrest is the EPITOME of a deranged damsel. 

When she and Joshua Jackson’s Dan Gallagher begin their affair, things seem to be promising. After Dan ends things, it gets a little messy, a little murder-y, and a little (lotta) malicious.

Team Pacey 4ever. 

Honorable Mention 

I’ll fully admit that this is a weird pull, but go with it. Does anyone remember She Gets What She Wants aka Slap Her She’s French (yeah, I’m not a fan of the original title either)? For those who don’t (most of you), Piper Perabo stars as a French exchange student who begins stripping Jane McGregor’s Starla Grady of all her popularity and notoriety. 

As you can probably guess, Piper Perabo’s Genevieve Le Plouff isn’t who she appears to be, and her ridiculous vendetta has to be seen to be believed. 

I love Natasha Lyonne and Clea Duvall.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping John Hughes’s Sixteen Candles into the ol’ VCR. 

Okay, before I say anything else, I want to address a couple of things here. 1) John Hughes was horrible to Molly Ringwald and 2) There are several offensive things in this movie. I fully recognize both of these points, and I don’t condone any of the problematic content in this movie. 

I’m only here to talk about Sixteen Candles because I watch it every year during my birthday week, in a tradition that started long before I could recognize its flaws. It was something I initially shared with KP, and I’ve been watching it every year for the past 16 years. 

I get Chinese takeout (like we always used to), and it’s a whole tradition. Again, I don’t condone any of the offensive content within this movie. It’s just a silly little tradition I’ve kept alive, by myself, and it’s one I want to continue, especially with KP being gone. 

Alrighty, now that I’ve probably overshared and over-explained things (two of my many talents), let’s talk Sixteen Candles. 

This has been all of our Facebook cover photos at one point or another. 

When I was 15, my sister got me two very distinct gifts: a nice razor and a John Hughes movie pack that came in a Trapper Keeper, complete with soundtracks. Sixteen Candles, Weird Science, and The Breakfast Club were all included. While I love Weird Science and The Breakfast Club both, Sixteen Candles is the one I revisit annually. 

Call it the romantic in me, or the fact that I wasn’t super popular in high school, but Molly Ringwald’s Sam Baker became an idol for my teenage self. Granted, she’s a little Rory Gilmore-y at times, but I just loved her. I also used to yearn for my own Jake Ryan, who would be standing behind a passing car to sweep me away. Granted, Jake Ryan also has some flaws, but I was a teenager at the time. And would only make the mistake of liking the wrong people for 13-14 more years, at least. 

Fortunately, KP never forgot a single birthday, and she made a huge deal out of not only the day, but the month. She once filled my entire bedroom with balloons. And when I say my entire bedroom, I mean you couldn’t see the floor. While I didn’t know Sam’s forgotten birthday plight, I still reveled in her teen angst. 

I used to be obsessed with this outfit. 

Now, on the precipice of 31, I recognize all of the flaws of Sixteen Candles and its characters. But, I just can’t let it go. I don’t know if it’s because I’m a creature of habit, I miss KP, or the tiniest part of 15-year-old Baillee lives on, but my annual rewatch of Sixteen Candles is something I can’t seem to shake. 

On that note, I’ll leave you with one of the best pieces of 80s fatherly advice from Paul Dooley’s Jim Baker I can muster: “That’s why they call ‘em crushes. If they were easy, they’d call ‘em something else.” 

Sixteen Candles is now streaming on Hulu.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping The Sun Vanished into the ol’ VCR. 

The Sun Vanished was one of my first ARGs.

Let me set the scene. It was May 2020, and I was unemployed and staying with KP at my grandmother’s house. 

During this specific time in my life, I got really into YouTube channels like Bailey Sarian’s. However, I also got really into the likes of Local58 and The Sun Vanished. 

I don’t remember exactly how I found these two, but embarrassingly enough, I think it might’ve been on some sort of Buzzfeed listicle or The Infographics Show. Regardless of the source, I’m so excited that The Sun Vanished made its way to me. 

For those who aren’t familiar, The Sun Vanished is a Twitter-focused ARG where one day, the sun completely disappears and throws our lead character, TSV (The Sun Vanished), into perpetual darkness. 

Through various Twitter accounts, fan interactions, and creepy af videos, we’re introduced to an alien invasion story like no other. 

Now, I could recount years worth of tweets for you, but where’s the fun in that? Do yourself a favor and take a few hours to dive in. I promise you won’t be disappointed. 

And remember, don’t drink the water. 

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping Will McRobb and Chris Viscardi’s series The Adventures of Pete & Pete into the ol’ VCR. 

Much like Election, The Adventures of Pete & Pete is lightning in a bottle. There’s no way it would work today, and it perfectly encapsulates the weird and quirky spirit of the 90s. 

The Adventures of Pete & Pete is one of, if not, my favorite show of all time. I have Petunia on my leg. I tracked down the soundtrack on vinyl. I have all of the available seasons on DVD as well as an incredible box set from Slimeterion Collection (@slimeterioncollection on Instagram). Needless to say, I freakin’ love this show. 

I’m honestly just looking for someone who choreographs a marching band show about two molecules to bring me back to reality and prove their feelings.

If you aren’t familiar with this gem, The Adventures of Pete & Pete follows the life of two brothers, both named Pete, as they tackle the ups and downs of growing up. The show was originally comprised of shorts, but eventually, an entire show was developed. 

The Adventures of Pete & Pete boasts recurring cameos from the likes of Iggy Pop (no, seriously), folk musician Syd Straw, and 90s Nickelodeon royalty, Michelle Trachtenberg. It also stars another member of the 90s Nickelodeon royal family, Danny Tameberelli, and the one and only Toby Huss. 

I told y’all Iggy was in this show, but here’s, like, evidentiary support. 

We also need to give Michael C. Maronna, Alison Fanelli, Judy Grafe (RIP), and Hardy Rawls their dues. This entire cast is incredible and works so well together. 

The Adventures of Pete & Pete is so wonderfully weird. For me, it’s like someone recreated scenes from your childhood, but how you felt when you experienced them. There’s something magical and innocent about each episode. It’s bizarre at times, but that’s what makes the show as great as it is. 

So, friends, my advice to you is to buy the show, get some ice cream from Mr. Tastee, and let Pete teach you some sick burns. 

OUCH.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping shows that should get the iCarly reboot treatment into the ol’ VCR. 

Okay, listen. I absolutely adore the iCarly reboot. It definitely piles on the cheese like sports stadium nachos, BUT it’s still “adult” enough to enjoy; it’s the perfect mix of nostalgic Nickelodeon (minus the gross Dan Schnieder) and adult humor, but doesn’t lose its charm. And I believe it’s laid a really good foundation for future reboots, as we all know they’re coming. 

That’s why I want to officially pitch five other shows I believe could be rebooted in this style: Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide, Victorious, Phil of the Future, So Weird, and Lizzie McGuire, with an honorable mention as always. 

Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide

This one is probably the most obvious. Let’s bring Ned back to give us advice on adulthood. I want to know his feelings on Bumble dates, office interactions, and Gen Z. C’mon, Nickelodeon. If you’re bringing us the Zoey 101 revival that no one wants, give us something we do! 

Survival Guide to: Getting Out of Plans You Impulsively Made on a Good Mental Health Day

Victorious

I’m going to be really honest — I put a lot of thought into the Victorious reboot. Jade and Tori are roommates. Jade is working for a famous tech company, and Tori is working as a barista and trying to make it on broadway. Trina is a YouTube star. André just signed with a major label. Beck is Tori’s agent. Robbie fell in a Taco Bell and is now a millionaire. And they constantly make jokes about where Cat is. I’ve done most of the legwork, so let’s get this puppy into pre-production. 

Tori could sing/write a song called “Thanks a Latte,” and it’s about all the shitty customers at her coffee shop.

So Weird 

My idea for the So Weird reboot might be my favorite. Fi and Annie co-host a paranormal podcast and decide to join Molly on her reunion tour. Jack has become Molly’s tour manager, and Clu runs all of her social media accounts. It’s perfect. 

Let’s call the reboot So, So Weird.

Phil of the Future

Keely and Phil finally meet up in the future. However, they’re now faced with navigating a relationship after all this time apart. All of the secondary characters can be used as our Rosencrantz and Guildensterns, and Keely and Phil’s relationship can evolve over the course of a couple seasons. Plus, there are so many opportunities for obstacles, and you can hit the humorous beats without being too goofy. 

I love Mates of State. 

Lizzie McGuire

I KNOW IT’S PROBABLY NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN, BUT A GIRL CAN DREAM. The Lizzie McGuire reboot would fall squarely between How I Met Your Father and the iCarly reboot. I want to see Lizzie as a successful blogger who still faces everyday challenges with the help of Gordo. Controversially, I want to just keep Gordo as her best friend instead of a love interest. Again, I know it’s never going to happen because Disney doesn’t believe adulthood is real, but I’d love to see it. And duh, we’re keeping cartoon Lizzie in the mix. 

Imagine cartoon Lizzie taking her BC and anti-anxiety meds. 

Honorable mention

I think it would be extremely disrespectful to continue The Famous Jett Jackson without Lee Thompson Young (RIP). But, if he was still with us, I think it would be a wonderful opportunity to talk about being a child actor. There could be cameos from other famous child actors like Macaulay Culkin playing fictionalized versions of themselves that Jett could catch up with as he decides to re-enter the acting world after a hiatus. 

RIP. 

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping Alexander Zapletal’s The Ketchup Vampires into the ol’ VCR. 

Okay, friends, let’s get personal for a moment. If you remember waaaayyyy back in January when I first started the B Movies Blog (WOWZA), I wrote a little intro where I discussed why I write about pop culture. In said intro, I talked about being sick a lot as a kid (KP would sleep in clothes because she never knew if we would be going to the ER or not). 

Well, The Ketchup Vampires was one of the movies I was talking about when I mentioned getting to pick up movies from the likes of Big Lots and Dollar General. Needless to say, it holds a very special place in my heart. 

I watched it again for the first time in probably 20 years, and it’s truly wild. I’m also unsure if it’s a series or a movie, and sadly, I couldn’t find a lot of information about it. It seems to be from 1995, German in origin, dubbed, and the best part is, the American version (at least) is narrated by Elvira. 

I’ll give you a moment to process everything. 

Ready? Let’s keep going. 

The Frog Bros are at it again. 

If the name isn’t obvious, The Ketchup Vampires is a tale about tomato-loving vampires, their blood sausage-sucking counterparts, and a human family that gives big Little Miss Sunshine meets Flubber vibes. 

Our ketchup vampires and mortal family all live together, Full House-style, and Pinot, one of the vamps, and Bella, the mortal daughter, are in love (Stephanie Meyer clearly drew inspiration from this obscure children’s cartoon). Bella’s father is a scientist. Bella’s Uncle Leo looks like the love child of Frankenberry and Heat Miser. You get the picture. 

However, when Countess Helga and co show up to unearth an important book, all bets are off. There’s also a baby, a gaggle of male teenage vampires, Dracula?, etc… Again, it’s all truly insane. 

Don’t take glowing Ring Pops from strangers. 

The good news is, you can watch both The Ketchup Vampires and The Ketchup Vampires 2 (yes, there are two of these bad boys) on YouTube for free, so you can revel in the madness with me. 

Grab some Heinz, tie some red fabric around your head like a sweatband, and prepare for the sheer insanity that is The Ketchup Vampires.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping some of my favorite movie outfits into the ol’ VCR. 

Before we begin, I’m going to be honest. My choices here are going to ruffle some feathers. Colin, if you’re reading this, I can hear you gagging at the 10 Things I Hate About You mention. 

Listen, there are few things in this life I can control, and my silly pop culture blog is one of them. So, I’m subjecting all of you to my taste, gd it. 

JK, I love all of you and appreciate your support. I hope you enjoy me doing my little turn on the fictional catwalk. I present to you, in no particular order, five of my favorite movie outfits. 

Bianca Stratford’s prom dress

Okay, we’re going to rip the bandaid off. I’ve always loved this outfit from 10 Things I Hate About You, and I’ll defend it the same way I defend Gale Weathers’ bangs. 

Jane Spofford’s post-coital transformation fit 

Okay, it’s clear I have a type. I’m a sucker for a crop top and a tulle moment, so I always LIVE for this scene in The Witches of Eastwick.

Sally Owens’ confession ensemble 

Let’s be real. I’d wear anything and everything the Owens women wear in Practical Magic, but for some reason, this outfit has always stuck with me. 

Elle Woods’ “I’m taking the dog, dumbass” moment

Next to Bianca’s prom dress, I think this is my most controversial choice. Elle serves throughout the entirety of Legally Blonde, but I absolutely love this look. 

Emily Nelson’s suit, baby 

My sexuality is Blake Lively in A Simple Favor. Holy hell. This was my most difficult choice, by far, and please know that the white suit from the graveyard scene is a close second.