B Movies Blog

Note: Check back for updates as new content is announced!

January 2026

January 2 – We Bury The Dead (Theaters)

January 6 – Will Trent (ABC, Next day Hulu)

January 8 – The Traitors (Peacock)

January 8 – His & Hers (Netflix)

January 9 – People We Meet On Vacation (Netflix)

January 9 – Sleepwalker (Theaters)

January 9 – Primate (Theaters)

January 16 – Night Patrol (Theaters)

January 16 – 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple (Theaters)

January 21 – The Beauty (FX, Next day Hulu)

January 21 – Queer Eye (Netflix)

January 22 – Finding Her Edge (Netflix)

January 23 – Return to Silent Hill (Theaters)

January 28 – School Spirits (Paramount+)

January 28 – Shrinking (Apple TV+)

January 30 – Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die (Theaters)

January 30 – Iron Lung (Theaters)

January 30 – Send Help (Theaters)

February 2026

February 6 – The Strangers: Chapter 3 (Theaters)

February 6 – Dracula (Theaters)

February 6 – Pillion (Theaters)

February 6 – Whistle (Theaters)

February 8 – The ‘Burbs (Peacock)

February 13 – “Wuthering Heights” (Theaters)

February 13 – GOAT (Theaters)

February 13 – Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie (Theaters)

February 18 – 56 Days (Prime)

February 20 – This is Not a Test (Theaters)

February 25 – Scrubs (ABC, next day Hulu)

February 27 – Scream 7 (Theaters)

March 2026

March 5 – Ted (Peacock)

March 6 – The Bride (Theaters)

March 6 – Peaky Blinders: The Eternal Man (Theaters, Netflix on March 20)

March 11 – Scarpetta (Prime)

March 18 – Imperfect Women (Apple TV+)

March 20 – Project Hail Mary (Theaters)

March 27 – Ready or Not: Here I Come (Theaters)

March 27 – Fantasy Life (Theaters)

March 27 – They Will Kill You (Theaters)

April 2026

April 3 – The Drama (Theaters)

April 8 – The Boys (Prime)

April 10 – Malcolm in the Middle (Hulu)

April 15 – Margo’s Got Money Troubles (Apple TV+)

April 17 – The Mummy (Theaters)

April 17 – Normal (Theaters)

May 2026

May 1 – The Devil Wears Prada 2 (Theaters)

May 1 – Hokum (Theaters)

May 15 – Obsession (Theaters)

May 22 – I Love Boosters (Theaters)

June 2026

June 12 – Scary Movie 6 (Theaters)

June 19 – Toy Story 5 (Theaters)

July 2026

July 12 – Disclosure Day (Theaters)

July 17 – The Odyssey (Theaters)

August 2026

August 21 – Insidious: The Bleeding World (Theaters)

August 28 – The Dog Star (Theaters)

August 28 – Coyote vs. ACME (Theaters)

September 2026

September 11 – Sense and Sensibility (Theaters)

September 18 – Practical Magic 2 (Theaters)

September 18 – Play House (Theaters)

September 18 – Resident Evil (Theaters)

October 2026

October 1 – Terrifier 4 (Theaters)

October 2 – Digger (Theaters)

October 9 – Other Mommy (Theaters)

October 16 – Street Fighter (Theaters)

October 23 – Remain (Theaters)

November 2026

November 20 – The Hunger Games: Sunrise on the Reaping (Theaters)

December 2026

December 18 – Avengers: Doomsday (Theaters)

December 18 – Dune: Part Three (Theaters)

December 25 – Werewulf (Theaters)

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping the work of Judy Greer into the ol’ VCR.

On July 20, 1975, Judith Therese Evans was born. 

But you probably know our girl better as Judy Greer. 

I don’t have as much biographical info on Judy Greer as I’ve had for other actors we’ve done spotlights on, but I did find out that she did theater in high school and graduated from theater school. 

I also found out that her mom was allegedly asked to leave a convent because of a wild streak that included such transgressions as purchasing a red swimsuit. 

Judy Greer had one hell of a breakout role as Fern, aka Vylette, in Jawbreaker. Like, c’mon. 

Since then, she has gone on to play a plethora of iconic characters in a plethora of iconic movies and shows. 

Now, there’s not much more that I can say about Judy Greer that hasn’t already been said. 

Judy, if you ever read this, thank you. 🖤

Without further ado, here’s some of my favorite Judy Greer content: 

• Archer 
• 27 Dresses 
• Jawbreaker 
• 13 Going on 30 
• Arrested Development

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping Liquid Television into the ol’ VCR.

For a long time, I’ve been synonymous with Bo Burnham and A24. However, I feel like MTV is making its way into the fold. 

Yes, friends, we’re, yet again, covering another nostalgic MTV property: Liquid Television. 

From 1991-1995, Liquid Television gave viewers an eccentric mix of animated segments and shorts, including some from a little creator you might know named Mike Judge. 

That’s right, kids. 

Liquid Television is essentially where Beavis and Butt-Head originated, not to mention the likes of Æon Flux. 

The best way I can describe Liquid Television is like a mix of KaBlam!, The Nighttime Clap, and true 90s weirdness and nihilism. 

I feel like you’ll either understand what I mean or you won’t. 

Moving on. 

If you read our Zoog piece, you’ll also remember that the Colossal Pictures peeps worked on Liquid Television. 

That’s because Colossal Pictures actually produced Liquid Television, which I didn’t know. Learning! 

Now, we’ve come to the unfortunate part of our program where I have to tell you that Liquid Television hasn’t aired since 1995. 

I know, I know. 

But, much like Daria, the episodes had so much licensed music that it would be impossible to show the episodes without either a) major cuts or b) major payouts to artists. 

Which, um, I don’t know why the last would be an issue for MTV, but, um, here we are. 

However, unlike Daria, I don’t think Liquid Television would hold up without all of the music. 

Hell, an entire part of the premise was animating music videos. 

You can find VHS and DVD copies with some of the episodes online from resellers, but all of the ones I saw were $60 and up, so I couldn’t justify taking the plunge. 

The good news is, you can find most of the episode intact online. 

The only catch is, some parts have had to be removed…which includes Æon Flux. 

BUT, you can find episodes of Æon Flux online as well, so I give kudos to the Liquid Television MTV channel for uploading so much of each episode and taking the time to remove things, like Æon Flux, that would get the videos taken down.

I guess this *technically* counts as lost and refound media, but it also did have a physical release, albeit a limited release, so I don’t want to give it the title. 

So, I guess we’ll just title this one good ol’ nostalgia.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping influencer horror ARGs into the ol’ VCR.

As we all know, I watch a lot of YouTube. 

Additionally, Instagram is my social media platform of choice. 

Finally, we KNOW I love a good analog horror series and/or horror ARG. 

With all this in mind, it should come as no surprise that I’ve had influencer horror ARGs on the brain lately. 

And, in my mind, there are two big ones: I Am Sophie and #NeverAlone. 

I did think about including Ash Vlogs, but I decided to tackle that in a different piece because it just doesn’t *quite* fit the vibe. 

I also thought I would share with all of you an idea that I’ve come up with for an influencer horror ARG, with the promise that if any of you make it, you have to give me credit for the idea. 

Now, there’s no possible way I can hit every single piece of these ARGs, so I’m going to give you a generic overview of each. BUT, I will link Night Mind’s series on in the I Am Sophie section. 

That way, if you want a more thorough look into the series, you can curl up on the couch with your popcorn and dive in like I did. 

Additionally, I’ll link the full Instagram account for Cassandra Clemm in the #NeverAlone section, so you can take a look for yourselves. My only disclaimer is that I’m not sure exactly how much of the ARG is still up. 

Alrighty, that should do us for introductions and disclaimers. 

Without further ado, may I present to you, I Am Sophie and #NeverAlone: 

I Am Sophie 

When the first video on the I Am Sophie channel dropped back in 2020, it was clear that something was afoot…and that something would become a rollercoaster of a horror ARG. The first few entries of the series are GREAT. Seriously, I have no notes. In fact, creator Tom Ransom even created a cut to send to film festivals, and it looks like it won first place at one in Rhode Island. 

I would argue that the first half to the first two-thirds of I Am Sophie are wonderful. I love the concept of a stereotypically wealthy and out-of-touch influencer being chased down by a personification of the negative side of the internet, as well as his possessed lackeys. 

However, once we start getting deep into the Simon stuff, I feel like we lose the plot. I love the whole idea of Lana, but I just feel like the ending leaves something to be desired.

In Tom Ransom’s defense though, I feel like maintaining a series of this caliber was extremely time-consuming and difficult. As a, deep sigh, creator myself, I can feel the burnout, and I just film one video a week. I can’t imagine how crazy it must’ve been to bring something like this to life. 

The I Am Sophie channel is still up, as is her Instagram account, and I highly recommend checking both of them out. Also, as I mentioned earlier, Night Mind covered the series at length, so I recommend checking out his synopsis as well. 

Video source: Night Mind

#NeverAlone

The whole #NeverAlone ARG is a wild one. Cassandra Clemm’s account started out just like any aspiring influencer’s. She posted artistic pictures of herself with coffee, in different outfits, and throughout the day. However, through comments, captions, and uploads, it became very clear that something sinister was lurking just beneath the surface…and Cassandra’s mental health might be deteriorating before our very eyes. 

The minds behind #NeverAlone were revealed to be Chloe Cole (who played Cassandra), Sabina Friedman-Seitz, and Anna Miles. And, much like Tom Ransom and Co, they compiled everything into a horror short called Zenith that made its way into the 13 Minutes of Horror Film Festival.

My ARG Idea 

Okay, so I’ve been noodling an idea for a long time, and I think it has some legs. 

Picture it: 

Claire (I’m not married to the name) is a mommy vlogger who posts videos with her kid regularly. Suddenly, she starts uploading more traditional influencer content (sans kid) like GRWMs, travel vlogs, you name it. 

People start asking her where her kid went, and Claire has no idea what we’re talking about. She has no recollection of being a mom, and there are no indicators of any children in her home. Nothing. 

Also, similar to EverymanHYBRID, she can’t see certain uploads. 

However, after a viewer sends her one of the videos, Claire goes on a mission to find the child she can’t remember and to try to return to a life that may or may not be hers. 

I feel like there’s the potential to involve other YouTubers, provide a lot of commentary around the influencer community, etc… 

I haven’t quite fleshed out what the big bad is, but again, I think there’s something here. 

And, if one of you makes it, you have to credit me and somehow involve the B Movies Channel in some capacity.

That’s all I ask.

Hello, movie mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies blog. Today, we’re popping 32 of my favorite movies into the ol’ VCR. 

As many of you know, tomorrow is my 32nd birthday. 

Last year, we rang in my birthday with 31 of the movies that made me. 

I was trying to figure out what to do this year, and, to be honest, I was initially stumped. 

My original idea was to list out 32 of my favorite movies. 

But, a) I feel like I’ve shared a lot of my faves with y’all already and b) it started to become a similar lineup to last year. 

Then, genius struck. 

Instead of listing some of my favorite movies, I’m going to list a movie recommendation from each year I’ve been alive thus far. 

Is it putting more work on myself?

Absolutely. 

But when has that ever stopped me from doing something?

I’m also going to try to stray away from some obvious pics, i.e. Scream for 1996, The Blair Witch Project for 1999, etc… 

Also, since these are movies I’m picking off the fly, I can’t be as thorough with the CW/TWs. 

I HIGHLY recommend researching all of these movies before watching them. 

Alrighty, that should do us for introductions and disclaimers. 

Without further ado, here are 32 movie recommendations for each of my 32 years:

1992: Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me 

1993: Needful Things 

1994: Serial Mom

1995: Tank Girl 

1996: Fargo 

1997: Clockwatchers 

1998: SLC Punk 

1999: Dick 

2000: O Brother, Where Art Thou?

2001: Get Over It

2002: Crossroads 

2003: Mystic River 

2004: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 

2005: Elizabethtown 

2006: Stick It 

2007: Juno 

2008: The House Bunny 

2009: Whip It 

2010: Black Swan 

2011: Sucker Punch 

2012: Chastity Bites 

2013: Cheap Thrills 

2014: Frank 

2015: Green Room 

2016: Found Footage 3D 

2017: Baby Driver 

2018: Slice 

2019: The Farewell 

2020: Uncle Peckerhead 

2021: V/H/S/94 

2022: X

2023: No One Will Save You 

2024: Challengers

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping the work of Ashley Park into the ol’ VCR.

On June 6, 1991, Ashley Park was born. 

And, it seems she was born to perform. 

Starting dance lessons at three and piano lessons at five, Ashley Park was basically a star from a young age. 

Her love of performing would continue as she grew up, as she participated in her middle and high schools’ choir and theater programs. She even founded an a capella group at her high school. 

Unfortunately, in the 10th grade, Ashley was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia. The disease forced an eight-month long hospitalization, but she underwent treatment, eventually going into remission. 

HELL YEAH. 

During her hospitalization, the Make-A-Wish Foundation helped her and her family go to New York and see several Broadway shows, which is where it seems her passion for musical theater skyrocketed. 

In 2014, Ashley made her Broadway debut in Mamma Mia!

Over the years, she’s starred in several musicals, including Mean Girls as the iconic Gretchen Wieners. She’s also been nominated for and received several awards for her performances. 

In 2019, Ashley was cast in Emily in Paris, and the rest is history. 

The only other thing I want to mention is that late last year, Ashley had septic shock, and, because she’s a badass, made a full recovery. 

There’s not much more that I can say about Ashley Park that hasn’t already been said. 

Ashley, if you ever read this, thank you. 🖤

Without further ado, here’s some of my favorite Ashley Park content: 

• Beef
• Joy Ride 
• Girls5Eva 
• Emily in Paris
• Mean Girls (2024)
• Only Murders in the Building

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping a handy Alicia Silverstone vs Rachel Blanchard guide into the ol’ VCR. 

I fear that this may be one that only I think is funny, but I’m really amused by this entire concept. 

This might be like the HSM Dante’s Inferno piece, but, by god, I’m gonna post it anyway. 

Do you ever find yourself wondering if the film you’re watching has Alicia Silverstone or Rachel Blanchard? 

To the untrained eye, they look identical. 

And to the trained eye, they also look identical. 

The only big difference is one supports RFK Jr. (YIKES), and the other is Rachel Blanchard. 

I digress.

Friends, I have a solution for you. 

I’ve created a little cheat sheet to help you differentiate the two Chers. 

Could you Google it? 

Absolutely. 

But, this idea makes me giggle, so there you have it. 

Alrighty, without further ado, here’s a handy dandy guide to whether or not its Alicia Silverstone or Rachel Blanchard. 

Clueless 

• Girl, it’s Alicia! 

Are You Afraid of the Dark?

• Girl, it’s Rachel! 

Batman & Robin 

• Girl, it’s Alicia! 

The Rage: Carrie 2

• Girl, it’s Rachel! 

Blast from The Past 

• Girl, it’s Alicia! 

Clueless: The TV Show 

• Girl, it’s Rachel! 

The Lodge 

• Girl, it’s Alicia! 

Sugar & Spice

• Girl, it’s Rachel! 

Vamps

• Girl, it’s Alicia! 

Flight of the Conchords 

• Girl, it’s Rachel! 

Model Behavior and Psych 

• Girl, that’s Maggie Lawson!

Hello, movie mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping The Ashlee Simpson Show into the ol’ VCR. 

Don’t ask me how, but MTV has, yet again, crept its way onto the B Movies Blog. 

And this time I’m bringing a real gem up from the depths. 

That’s right, friends… 

We’re talking about The Ashlee Simpson Show.

From June 2004 – March 2005, MTV gave us an in-depth look at Ashlee Simpson’s life, which included everything from learning how to clean an apartment to recording Autobiography. 

(And don’t worry, I already have an LCA for Autobiography in the works.) 

Video source: Piecesofashlee33

Now, I want to go ahead and address the elephants in the room. 

Yes, Ashlee Simpson was 19 when the show started, and yes, that’s extremely exploitative. 

I know she was legally an adult, but she was a TEENAGER. 

Also, Ryan Cabrera has been proven to allegedly be a piece of shit. 

Also also, her producers praise her for writing a song about dating a guy older than her? Like, double her age?

So, it’s not great. 

Additionally, the entire point of the show was just to get exposure for her album. 

Needless to say, it was a quintessential, problematic early 2000s reality show. 

It also…kind of makes me sad to watch because it’s clear that Ashlee desperately wants to step out of Jessica’s shadow (which, uh, the song “Shadow” is about), and it feels icky to watch. 

Especially when you realize that The Ashlee Simpson Show had the time slot directly following Newlyweds. 

She even has a terrible boyfriend named Josh for a hot minute who openly treats her like hot garbage for as long as he’s in the picture (which is one episode that ends with a montage of their time together after they break up as Ashlee sings “Unreachable”). 

Because, if you know your lore, she begins dating Ryan Cabrera. 

And, her family kind of treats her like trash, to boot?

I honestly feel bad for her. 

Sure, I more than understand that she has HELLA privilege, but I just feel like they’re really exploiting a teenage girl who’s trying to find herself. 

They also cover the SNL incident, and again, I feel horrible for her because it’s clear she wasn’t feeling well. 

I guess I’ve become an Ashlee Simpson sympathizer in my old age?

(Just in some of the context of the show and not for anything problematic she’s done, to clarify.) 

I digress. 

If you want to reminisce about the early aughts (and give yourself full-body cringes), I’d recommend watching all of the episodes, which, surprisingly, are super easy to find on YouTube. 

In fact, you can find all of the episodes on this handy playlist on Ashlee Simpson Music’s channel. 

Are there any other old reality shows you’d like me to dive into?

Baby, just ask me.

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen into the ol’ VCR.

Growing up, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen were pop culture royalty in my eyes. 

I watched every single movie and show. 

Unfortunately, I couldn’t wear the clothing because there weren’t really any plus-size options, but I did have a LOT of the accessories, like the sunglasses and even the folding chair. 

I also still have The New Adventures of Mary-Kate and Ashley Game Boy Color game (and my Game Boy Color), which, like most of their games, is completely unbeatable. 

Video source: Longplay Universe

However, as we slowly found out, there was a dark side to the Olsen twins’ fame and fortune. 

Now, I’m not going to dive into any of the alleged struggles the Olsen twins faced or anything in that vein. 

I just don’t want to speculate about their personal lives, and I feel like the media has hounded them enough, as their public appearances are now few and far between. 

I hope that they’re both happy and healthy, and that’s the extent of what I’ll say about their personal lives. 

Moving on. 

I think the best way to tackle the Olsen twins’ pop culture empire is to divide it into three parts: The Movies, The Shows, and The Merchandise. 

I’m also going to throw out my top five favorite Mary-Kate and Ashley movies, just for kicks and gigs, so be sure to read through to the end. 

Alrighty, that should do us for introductions and disclaimers. 

Without further ado, let’s jump into the world of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. 

The Movies 

The Olsen twins began acting on Full House in 1987 at only six months old, and their film career wouldn’t be far behind. In 1992, the first in an extensive catalog, To Grandmother’s House We Go, was released as a made-for-TV movie on ABC. 

One year later, in 1993, Dualstar, the Olsen’s production company, would begin producing all of Mary-Kate and Ashley’s movies, including How the West Was Fun, Double, Double Toil and Trouble, and the beloved The Adventures of Mary-Kate & Ashley collection. 

Soon after the initial Dualstar releases, Mary-Kate and Ashley would star in the ICONIC It Takes Two, as well as the You’re Invited to Mary-Kate & Ashley’s… series. 

Video source: Cretchy Chretien

Then, in 1998, Billboard Dad was released, which kicked off all of the direct-to-video films we all came to know and love. The full list includes: 

• Billboard Dad 
• Passport to Paris 
• Switching Goals 
• Our Lips Are Sealed 
• Winning London 
• Holiday in the Sun 
• Getting There
• When in Rome 
• The Challenge  

Shortly after the release of The Challenge, the Olsen twins would bless us with one last film in New York Minute before stepping out of the spotlight for good. 

The Shows 

While the Olsen twins made cameos in several shows over the years, they starred in two shows together: Two of a Kind and So Little Time. 

Each show only ran for 22 and 26 episodes respectively, and unfortunately, like their direct-to-video releases, it’s almost impossible to find the episodes anywhere, outside of stumbling across a box set from a reseller. 

Upon further research (aka me doing a bunch of Googling), it looks like Two of a Kind was canceled, but from what I can tell, both shows fell victim to the Fox Family to ABC Family switcharoo (allegedly/in my opinion). 

There’s also one last show that I would be remiss to not mention: Mary-Kate and Ashley in Action! Like the aforementioned two shows, it was canceled after one season on ABC’s One Saturday Morning. 

Video source: Evan’s Media Archive

The Merchandise  

Now, we can’t talk about Mary-Kate and Ashley without talking about all of the merchandise, of which there were legions. We’re talking books, video games, perfumes, you name it. But, the crown jewel of the Mary-Kate and Ashley merchandise was the fashion line. 

Now, I want to briefly pause to insert a trademark criticism here.  

I could never wear anything from their fashion line when I was growing up because the sizing was extremely limited. I’ve already talked about the fashion of the 2000s and its shitty size inclusion, so I’ll let you read more about my opinions here. 

I digress. 

Mary-Kate and Ashley had a clothing line for young girls that was available in Walmart. Walmart also carried their perfumes and makeup. I can’t find the *exact* dates their line was available, but it looks like most of the aughts?

I would also be remiss if I didn’t mention the Mary-Kate and Ashley dolls. The Olsen twins released Barbie-esque dolls that came dressed in everything from pjs to outfits from their shows and movies. I had SEVERAL, and I can’t thank KP enough for getting some of them for me because a) we didn’t have a lot of money and b) I’m sure she had to fend off a ton of other parents to get them for me. 

Video source: Analog Memories

My Favorites

We’ve finally reached the part of the program where I’m going to reveal my top five favorite Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. And, spoiler, it’s probably going to be controversial. 

In no particular order, here are my top five favorite Mary-Kate and Ashley movies: 

• It Takes Two 
• New York Minute 
• Our Lips Are Sealed 
• Billboard Dad 
• Passport to Paris 

I SAID WHAT I SAID. 

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping the Lecterverse into the ol’ VCR.

Alrighty, friends, here she is—the highly-anticipated piece about the Lecterverse (but mostly Hannibal). 

For those who have absolutely no idea what I’m referring to, the Lecterverse is the nickname I’ve given to the world of Hannibal Lecter. 

Cute, right?

If you still don’t know what I’m talking about, Dr. Hannibal Lecter is the titular character from Thomas Harris’s book series. 

Lecter is a disgraced psychiatrist, who, as it turns out, is/was a cannibalistic serial killer and even went so far as to serve human flesh to unknowing friends. 

As most of you know, Silence of the Lambs is one of my favorite movies of all time, and I’ve always been fascinated with Lecter as a character. 

The Lecterverse currently stands at five films (technically), with Michael Mann’s 1986 Manhunter being the first. 

The other four in the series (aka the ones I consider to be canonical) are: 

• Jonathan Demme’s The Silence of the Lambs 
• Ridley Scott’s Hannibal 
• Brett Ratner’s Red Dragon 
• Peter Webber’s Hannibal Rising 

The Lecterverse also consists of two ill-fated series: 

• Hannibal (2013-2015) 
• Clarice (2021-2021) 

And, today, we’re going to be focusing on the former. 

For YEARS, people have told me to watch Hannibal. 

It’s very queer, they’ve said. 

It’s very horror-centric, they’ve said. 

It’s a show you really need to watch, they’ve said. 

So, friends, I’ve finally done it. I’ve watched the entire series

And, as expected, your girl has some thoughts. 

I just want to smash their faces together like Barbie dolls

Let’s start with my overall thoughts. 

Hannibal is very gay, very horny (both literally and figurately), and very fucked up in the way that I like. 

I think Hannibal suffered the same fate as most horror shows with primetime spots in the late aughts/early 2010s, like Fear Itself—the normies just weren’t ready for this one. 

I don’t think Hannibal would’ve even had half the problems it did had it come out today on streamer. 

In fact, I think it would’ve been gayer, hornier, and more brutal on a streamer. 

I also think Hannibal is a testament to how much of a bummer it is that the crew of Crystal Lake didn’t trust Bryan Fuller’s vision, as I think he would’ve given Friday the 13th a breath of fresh air. 

Brb, wearing this during Pride month next year 

Overall, I did enjoy Hannibal. 

I think the first two seasons are really strong. 

I love how Michael Pitt (and later, Joe Anderson, when he took over) plays Mason Verger like a Batman villain/old-timey gangster. 

I’ve also never wanted two people to kiss more in my entire life than Will Graham (Hugh Dancy) and Hannibal (Mads Mikkelsen). 

BUT, the third season…was laborious. 

I’m not going to lie to y’all. 

Those first six episodes were ROUGH to get through. 

In fact, that’s part of the reason why it took me so long to finish the show and write this piece. 

The third season also yields some of my biggest criticisms of the show overall…as well as some of my most controversial opinions. 

I obviously support gay rights as a queer woman, but this hair is a gay wrong

Now, admittedly, I do believe Hannibal begins to jump the shark towards the end of the second season, particularly with the Will/Margot Verger (Katharine Isabelle) storyline where she uses him as a sperm donor. 

Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE Katharine Isabelle, but that storyline just doesn’t work for me. 

Additionally, I have two other hot takes: 

1. I think Dr. Bedelia Du Maurier’s (Gillian Anderson) character should’ve been cut after she visited Will and told him she believed him. 
2. I think Dr. Alana Bloom (Caroline Dhavernas) should’ve been killed off at the end of season two. 

I know, I know. 

I grew up on The X-Files, so y’all know I love Gillian Anderson, but I think her character overstays her welcome. 

And, when it comes to Alana, I think this whole descent into darkness arc comes out of nowhere, and it’s not really to our benefit. 

I do love that she and Margot are partners, and I do love that we actually get a sex scene between the two of them.

But, I also have mixed feelings because I know the only reason the network signed off is because sex between two girls is hot/fetishized. 

One thing I will give the first half of season three, though, is the scene where Jack Crawford (Laurence Fishburne) beats the everloving SHIT out of Hannibal; it’s truly one of the best scenes of the entire season. 

The only reason I’m glad Alana made it to season three is for this cunty little suit

But again, overall, I do think Hannibal is a good show. 

Would I like it to be even gayer? Yes. 

But alas, this was NBC in the 2010s, so we’re lucky we got what we did. 

I do also wish that Bryan Fuller would’ve gotten the chance to give his interpretation of Buffalo Bill, as well as Clarice Starling. 

Now, this is the part that I’ve been struggling with on this piece. 

How do I end a piece about the Lecterverse?

I tried giving Hannibal Lecter’s reviews of fast food chains…and hated it. 

I tried making fake recipes…and hated it. 

So instead, we’re just going to simplify things. 

Keeping something simple? On the B Movies Blog? There’s a first time for everything. 

Instead of trying too hard, I’m going to leave you with five of my favorite Hannibal Lecter quotes from Silence of the Lambs: 

5. “A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.”

4. “Well, Clarice – have the lambs stopped screaming?” 

3. “You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well-scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste.”

2. “I have no plans to call on you, Clarice. The world is more interesting with you in it.”

1. “Oh, and Senator, just one more thing: love your suit!”

Hello, Movie Mavens! Welcome back to the B Movies Blog. Today, we’re popping the one-year anniversary of the B Movies Channel into the ol’ VCR.

A little over a year ago, I sent Elliott a text asking her what if, hypothetically, we started a YouTube channel for B Movies. 

She immediately said yes, and thus began one of the craziest journeys I’ve ever started. 

I’ll be honest—I was absolutely freakin’ terrified to start a YouTube channel. 

I’ve been writing on the internet for 13+ years, so I’m used to hate comments and having complete strangers come for me. 

But putting myself on YouTube for over 25 minutes a week?

Now THAT made me anxious. 

However, I don’t regret it for a second. 

I feel like the B Movies Channel has really come into its own over the past year. 

I watched a little bit of our debut video the other day, and I’m so proud of myself. 

My nerves got the best of me, and I was talking super fast to the point of gasping for air. 

Now, I just sit down, hit record, and feel like I’m having a conversation with all of you. 

Are there times we’ve gotten unsavory comments or people have discouraged me from continuing the channel IRL?

(Including someone being upset because I used our platform to talk about how it’s okay to not grieve the death of your abuser 12 hours after they died because it made the video start later—I couldn’t make this up if I tried.) 

Totally.

That’s the unfortunate reality of being on the internet. 

For the most part, though, everyone has been beyond supportive, and THAT’S why I want to keep releasing videos on the B Movies Channel. 

I’ll be even more honest and say that there have been times recently that I thought about ending it, but thanks to all of your support and patience in moving our release, it helped combat any burnout or hesitation I was feeling. 

The initial agreement I made with everyone was that I was going to try YouTube for a year and then go from there. 

Well, Movie Mavens, I’m here to tell you that we currently plan to keep going. 

I love the time I spend each week with you. 

I love writing scripts. 

I love scouring the internet and social media to find you all different kinds of content. 

I never thought I’d say this, but I love YouTube. 

So, Movie Mavens, here’s to a full year of the B Movies Channel, and to many, many more. 

Thank you so much for everything. 🖤